Stage 2: Coming closer as a couple
In stage two, your love starts to really grow. You start to feel like the initial excitement, laughs, and romance are gradually evolving into a deeper and even more meaningful connection. This new person has taken over your life. They’re in your thoughts. They’re in your dreams. They’re in your everyday life. And you realize that your life no longer revolves entirely around your own self but it has started to revolve around this new relationship as well.
The things you used to do alone now involve them too, even if they are not present in the moment because your mind is always revolving around them. The magical process of thinking about a person and missing them when they are not around you starts in this stage.
It does go on in other stages too but is the strongest here, since all the feelings and emotions are new and so is your interest in them. ‘Coming close as a couple’ means evolving as human beings in terms of affection and understanding. This stage teaches us a lot of about love, life, expectations and selfless happiness since our life starts revolving around someone other than us.
It can be called the best stage of falling in love; the tickly feeling of holding hands while walking, the wish to shower them with presents and cook them their favorite food on a special day are all too magical. A lot of couples agree that this stage of falling in love is indeed the best and most pleasant one, and some are lucky enough to never get over this stage which is no less than a dream.
This is the stage where some couples decide to move in together or even get married. It’s the stage where both of you are extremely sure about everything, where you feel that this love will definitely last a lifetime.
Stage 3: Getting disillusioned
All the confusion and uncertainty that accompanies love tends to be the main theme of stage 3. This is the stage where one or sometimes both the partners start to feel unsure about what direction their relationship is going to take. They start to question whether they even made the right decisions in the previous two stages.
Although it is normal for human beings to be doubtful about things, yet we feel bad for doubting the relationship that we thought was so perfect. We discover each other’s flaws and for some time, our mind unconsciously concentrates on the flaws only, making us even more unpleasant a partner. But that phase is replaced soon if the two people have the heart for it, if they love each other enough to know the differences and respect them because that is the only way relationships thrive this stage; unconditional love, holding on to the good bits and remembering that person you love is more than just their habits.
This is the stage where you feel like things are starting to fall apart and where everything about this relationship starts to feel wrong, without any specific reason. You find yourself getting angry and resentful about the smallest things. You feel like there’s very less love and intimacy left in your relationship and you start to feel hopeless. All you want to do is bring back the passion, the initial spark or just any kind of chemistry but you just don’t know how to do it.
But the key is in finding the way to do it.
A lot of talking helps in this stage—when things do not seem to go the best way and the nature of the relationship is not as romantic as it used to be—so talk. Getting disillusioned is not an impossible stage to deal with although it sure is difficult. Paying more attention to the good days you have spent with them, all the happy places you have been to with them and all the times you have felt comfortable in their arms is the way to move on from stage 3.
Passing stage three is not an easy task. Very few couples have the potential to survive this stage but when they do, their relationship ends up getting even stronger and they start to feel more in love than ever before. – Continue reading on next page