If you are a person who is trying to set up a house and live alone for the first time, that is perfectly fine. You might feel that you aren’t ready for the new circumstances because maybe you just had a breakup with your partner and your things didn’t go how you’d hoped. But, no matter what you are feeling — confusion, stress, or anything in between — it is perfectly normal to have some turbulence, too.
Living alone doesn’t mean you are lonely. Below are some tips to help you embrace your new way of living, and find fulfilment when living alone.
Get to know yourself better
Living alone can be the perfect time to work on the most important relationship you have – with yourself.
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Before living alone, you probably spent a lot of time in the company of others. You focused on maintaining strong bonds with your friends, family, and others, but you didn’t have time to focus on yourself.
You should consider enjoying your free time, eating your favourite food, and enjoy your favourite show on Netflix. But, remember to ask yourself deeper questions. If you just ended a relationship, or you are exploring your goals, try identifying your values. A well-developed sense of yourself can help you identify what you want from relationships. This process can take time but try sorting your thoughts.
Prioritize your valued relationships
When living alone you have the opportunity to analyze your relationships. Back in the time you lived with roommates, they were your friends, but you didn’t get close to them. Or you spent a lot of time hanging with your partner, but you distanced yourself from your friends.
If these are stories that happened to you, try to take some time and identify your most valued relationships. Prioritize the most important ones. You are not supposed to spend your free time with people who make you unhappy.
Identify when you feel most lonely
Even if you are enjoying your solo living, you may feel lonely. These feelings can come stronger when you are around people.
Coming home to an empty house can sometimes be rough. But, that is completely normal. If you are a morning person and when you lived with your roommates, you enjoyed conversations over breakfast, try planning brunch with your loved ones. Or, all you can do is turn on your favourite music.
Spend more time in nature
If you spend more time outside, you don’t just get out of the house but can help you connect to the world while relieving stress. Get your attention to the birdsongs, rustling trees, or running water. This can help you to feel less alone.
Consider a pet
Have you ever wanted a furry companion? Well now is your chance. There is no need to worry, about your sibling’s fear of dos or roommate’s allergies.
If you have a pet, you will never come back to an empty house. Pets offer entertainment and also physical comfort (playing with a dog can release mood-boosting hormones), as many pet videos on Youtube prove.
Sometimes days feel a bit aimless? If you have a pet it would be easier for you to stick to a schedule, as they need regular care and feeding. In this case, having your pet insured would be a lifesaver (also time saver).
If you need a reason to go out, for a few daily walks a dog will hold you accountable.
Do days feel a little aimless? Having a pet makes it easier to stick to a schedule,
What if you can’t have a dog or a cat? In this case, you could consider a fish, bird, reptile or even a small mammal. They can make great pets, even though they may not be quite as cuddly or sociable. Just before making a decision read up on their care, as some of them need special diets, and some others might have a longer lifespan than you are preparing for.
Try new things
A very important part of self-discovery is exploring new interests.
It is quite hard to experiment in front of an audience. Trying new things in front of your family members, partners or roommates might make you feel nervous about trying new things. What if you don’t have artistic talent? Or find out you don’t enjoy playing violin or guitar after spending a lot of money and time on practicing and lessons.
While all these questions have their own merit, it is worth mentioning that a life without a little failure and trial can be very limited. Doing the same exact things with the same exact people is not necessarily bad. But breaking your routine can immensely expand your perspective, help you connect with new people and overall help you grow.
When you do not have anyone else to consider, established habits can really start to slip. Maybe you skip nutritious meals in favour of snacks, give up on a regular bedtime, wear the same clothes for 2 days, and finish the whole bottle of wine, because why not?
If these things happen occasionally, it may not be a big deal. But making it a routine and a pattern probably will not do you any kind of favours.
Good self-care practices can improve your physical and emotional well-being. Feeling good will make you more productive and make it easier to manage loneliness.
Try these strategies:
- In order to avoid relying on snacks, set time aside for meal planning and food preparation.
- Find a workout buddy, in case you lack motivation for regular exercise.
Try meditation to increase your awareness of what is happening to you day today.
- Experiment with wake up and sleep times just to determine what time feels most natural for you.
Find the positives
Most people might not agree, but living alone can be freeing for you. You do not have to get dressed in order to leave your room or to talk to yourself without worrying that someone might think you are crazy.
Living alone can:
- Help you boost your imagination and creativity
- It helps you to find time to recharge
- Lead to personal growth
- Allow you to focus on your hobbies and passions
Even if you prefer living on your own, it is not always easy. You could have moments where you want human interactions, even though you might value your personal space. But do not forget that even if you are living alone, you really are not. Still, your loved ones will be texting, calling you so you can have a chat with them.
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